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Accepting Loss and Finding Meaning: Using Acceptance and Commitment Therapy for Grief

Grief is a natural and normal response to loss, such as the death of a loved one, divorce, or job loss. Coping with grief can be challenging, and many people struggle to find effective ways to manage their emotions. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) provides a unique perspective on how to cope with grief.

According to ACT, grief is a normal human emotion, and it is essential to acknowledge and accept these emotions. In ACT, the focus is on accepting things as they are rather than trying to control them. This means acknowledging the pain and discomfort associated with grief and allowing yourself to feel these emotions without judgment. As Hayes et al. (2013) state, “The main goal of ACT is to help individuals accept the present moment, including all its pain and suffering, rather than attempting to control or avoid it.”

In coping with grief, ACT emphasizes the importance of maintaining a connection to our values and goals. When experiencing grief, it can be easy to lose sight of our values and goals, causing us to feel lost and disconnected. Therefore, ACT encourages individuals to stay connected to their values and goals, even in the face of loss.

One way to maintain this connection is by setting goals that align with our values. For example, if your value is to help others, you may set a goal to volunteer to help those who are also grieving. This not only helps you stay connected to your values but also provides a sense of purpose and meaning, which can be helpful in coping with grief.

Another tool used in ACT is mindfulness. Mindfulness allows us to observe our thoughts and emotions without judgment, helping us to avoid getting caught up in negative thoughts and emotions. This technique can be useful in coping with grief, as it allows us to acknowledge our emotions without becoming overwhelmed by them. According to Rostad and Whitlock (2018), “Mindfulness is a process that can increase awareness of emotions, thoughts, and physical sensations in the present moment, and therefore increase the likelihood of choosing a more adaptive response.”

Finally, ACT encourages individuals to take action, even in the face of difficult emotions. This means engaging in behaviors that align with our values and goals, even when we don't feel like it. By taking action, we can create a sense of momentum and progress, which can be helpful in coping with grief.

In conclusion, ACT provides a unique perspective on coping with grief. It encourages individuals to accept their emotions, maintain a connection to their values and goals, use mindfulness techniques, and take action, even in the face of difficult emotions. By doing so, individuals can find effective ways to manage their emotions and move forward in their lives.


Hayes, S. C., Strosahl, K. D., & Wilson, K. G. (2013). Acceptance and commitment therapy: The process and practice of mindful change. Guilford Publications.

Rostad, W. L., & Whitlock, J. L. (2018). Grief and loss: The role of mindfulness. In Handbook of mindfulness (pp. 663-676). Springer, Cham.

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